WHEN IS IT OK TO DATE AN EX'S FRIEND?
MARK:
FIRST OF ALL, I MUST UNDERSTAND YOUR USE OF THE TERM “EX FRIEND” AND FROM THERE WE CAN GO SEVERAL DIRECTIONS:
I ASSUMED YOU SPEAK OF SOMEONE YOU DATED IN THE PAST AND FOR WHAEVER REASONS, BROKE UP WITH. IN THIS INSTANCE, YOU CAN DATE WHEN THE TWO OF YOU HAVE GROWN AND THE PROBLEM(S) THAT CAUSE THE BREAK UP LONG AGO NO LONGER EXIST. WHEN TWO PEOPLE ARE AFTER THE SAME THINGS, IT’S REAL EASY TO MAKE IT WORK. JUST BE 100% SURE THAT THE PROBLEMS ARE GONE AND NOT JUST LYING DORMANT. IT CAN WORK!!
AMY:
FIRST OFF HOW CLOSE IS YOUR EX TO THIS FRIEND? ME PERSONALLY I
WOULDN'T DO IT, IT WON'T MAKE YOU LOOK GOOD BABY GIRL. THERE ARE PLENTY OF MEN OUT THERE, WHY STAY IN THE SAME CIRCLE. FIRST ASK YOURSELF, ARE YOU DOING THIS TO GET BACK AT YOUR EX, OR ARE YOU DOING IT BECAUSE YOU DIG THIS GUY.
MOST OF THE TIME WHEN FEMALES DO THINGS LIKE THAT ITS BECAUSE THEY ARE TRYING TO GET BACK AT SOMEONE. LITTLE DO THEY KNOW THEY ARE MAKING THEMSELVES LOOK DUMB AS HELLO. GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON AND OUT OF YOUR EX'S CIRCLE. IF YOU WANT TO BE LABELED AS A H## DO IT, BUT IF NOT, BABY GIRL MOVE ON. THERE ARE PLENTY MEN OUT THERE, JUST LET HIM FIND YOU. IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE TO GET WITH AN EX'S FRIEND JUST TO BE AROUND HIM, THEN BABY GIRL YOU ARE SERIOUSLY ILL. LOL LOL!!!! BUT HEY DO YOU, BUT I WOULDN'T ADVISE IT. STEP YOUR GAME UP LIKE ME, YA GIRL AMY, AND YOU CAN GET WHAT AND WHO YOU WANT.!!!!!!
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MARK DO YOU BELIEVE ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER I MEAN PEOPLE CAN CHANGE BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK?
MARK:
I BELIEVE THAT CIRCUMSTANCES DICTATE THE PATHS THAT WE “MEN” TAKE. IN SO MANY WORDS, YES; ONCE A CHEATER, THE POTENTIAL TO CHEAT STILL EXISTS!! LET ME EXPLAIN.
IN RELATIONSHIPS THAT ARE NOT PROVIDING WHAT MEN NEED, STRONG URGES TO “SUPPLEMENT” (GET THOSE THING THAT ARE MISSING) ARE OFTEN ACTED UPON. IT STARTS AS FLIRTING AND “WINDOW SHOPPING” AND EVENTUALLY THESE URGES ARE ACTED UPON.
IN RELATIONS THAT ARE VERY FULLFILLING, THESE URGES ARE STILL THERE. FLIRTING, “WINDOW SHOPPING”, DESIRE THE ATTENTION OF OTHER. IN GOOD RELATIONSHIPS, WE SUPPRESS THESE DESIRES AND DO EVERYTHING TO NOT ACT UPON THEM. WE DO A COST ANALYSIS: INSTANT GRASTIFICATION VS. LOSS OF FAMILY, ANOTHER MAN RAISING/BEATING YOUR CHILD, HOME THAT YOU HELP PAY FOR VS. 2-BEDROOM CONDO THAT YOU RENT. IN MOST INSTANCES, WE CHOSE TO NOT ACT BECAUSE THE LONG TERM RAMIFICATIONS OUT WEIGH THE INSTANT GAINS. BUT BELIVE ME, THOSE URGES ARE STILL THERE!!!!!
AMY THIS ONE IS FOR YOU, HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE MET THE ONE I MEAN PEOPLE CAN SAY ANYTHING AND GAME RECOGNIZE GAME SO HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN ITS REAL? WHEN DO YOU KNOW ITS TIME TO LET YOUR GUARD DOWN? SOME MEN SAY THEY CARE ABOUT YOU, NEED YOU AND STUFF BUT DO THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF WHAT THEY SAY HAS THAT HAPPEN TO YOU LATELY?
AMY:
I BELIEVE IF YOU GIVE A CHEATER AN OPPORTUNITY TO CHEAT, THEN
DAMMIT THEY WILL DO IT. I ALSO THINK YES SOME PEOPLE CAN CHANGE, BUT ONLY IF THEY WANT TO CHANGE. LIKE THEY SAY "YOU CAN'T TURN NO H@ INTO A HOUSE WIFE, AND YOU CAN'T TEACH A DOG NEW TRICKS. BELIEVE ME IF SOMEONE WANTS TO CHEAT, THEN THEY WILL DO IT NO MATTER HOW GOOD OF A PERSON THEY HAVE AT HOME. THE CHANGE HAS TO COME FROM WITHIN THAT PERSON, AND IF THEY'RE NOT WILLING TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER THEN THEY WILL CONTINUE CHEATING. IF YOUR MATE IS CHEATING ON YOU, LEAVE THEM, RUN, PACK YOUR BAGS AND GET THE HELL ON.
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IS RACISM IN AMERICA DEAD OR IS IT JUST SUPPRESSED WAITING FOR A NEW GENERATION?
MARK:
THOSE OF US FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO WORK IN SUPPORTIVE/RESPECTFUL ENVIRONMENTS AND LIVE IN CARING NEIGHBORHOODS SHOULD THANK GOD. THOSE OF US WHO HAVE BOSSES AND CO-WORKERS THAT ENBRACE AS OPPOSED TO SUSPECT/FEAR YOU SHAKE ALSO SAY A FEW WORDS OF THANKS TO GOD AS WELL. THE TRUTH IS, WE ALL LIKE TO SURROUND OURSELVES WITH THINGS THAT ARE TO OUR LIKINGS AND TASTES. WE LIKE TO HANG CLOSELY WITH PEOPLE THAT LOOK (COLOR) AND ENJOY SIMILAR THINGS. ALTHOUGH A FACTOR IT SHOULDN’T BE A WAY OF LIFE. DO WE EXCLUDE THOSE THAT ARE DIFFERENT? I HOPE NOT!!! I LISTEN TO ALL TYPES OF MUSIC AND HAVE DEVELOPED A SENSE OF APPRECIATION FOR THEM ALL: ROCK, POP, JAZZ, SOUL, HIP HOP, R & B, AND YES THE DREADED COUNTRY MUSIC (GREAT STORIES). I’VE ALSO SURROUNDED MYSELF WITH AN ASSORTMENT OF FRIENDS. I RESPECT THEM AND I HOPE THEY RESPECT ME AS WELL. WHEN IT’S ALL OVER AND DONE, I HOPE TO NOT BE JUDGE BY THE COLOR OF MY SKIN, BUT BY THE WORK THAT I PERFORMED DURING MY SHORT STAY HERE ON EARTH.
AMY:
RACISM IS STILL EVERYWHERE. WE WOULD LIKE FOR IT TO BE DEAD, BUT
KEEP IT REAL, WE KNOW THERE ARE STILL WHITES AND BLACKS OUT HERE THAT STILL THINK THEY ARE BACK IN THE SLAVERY DAYS. I DON'T THINK RACISM WILL EVER GO AWAY. IT MAY DISGUISE ITSELF, BUT IT WON'T GO AWAY. AS MUCH AS PEOPLE WOULD LIKE FOR EVERYONE TO BE EQUAL, WE ALL KNOW THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. YOU ALL PLAY BALL AGAINST RACIST PEOPLE ALL THE TIME. YOU SEE THEM IN THE MALLS, RESTAURANTS, AND PRACTICALLY EVERYWHERE. SO TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION, NO RACISM IS NOT DEAD AND I DON'T THINK IT WILL EVER BE, UNTIL THE GOOD LORD ABOVE COMES FOR US.
ONCE AGAIN YOUR GIRL AMY AKA "FINE AS WINE SHAKUR" HAS LAID IT DOWN FA YA!
amy keep doing your thing. Mark your response on racism what are you talking about answer the question. take a stance stop straddling the fence. what are you trying to do be a poster child for good will. and you didnt understand what the question about the ex's friend. Wow Basa you really need to rethink this guy. people want answers whether right or wrong not just a bunch of rhetoric. just drop Mark and let amy speak or replace him. i know that i am not the only one who feels this way. board members help me out.
